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You Scored High in Harmonizing in Storm
This suggests that when tension is high, you make effort to please the other person and keep the relationship strong, rather than pressing ahead with your own agenda. Harmonizing has a particular set of strengths and weaknesses that you should be aware of.
Harmonizing has Valuable Strengths
Characteristics of this style include:
But Don't Over-Use It
If you use Harmonizing when other styles are called for, the consequences can be difficult:
If you don't mind laughing at your tendencies, you might enjoy this hilariously exaggerated presentation of over-use of Harmonizing in a six-minute Saturday Night Live clip.
Take Steps to Maintain Balance
You can take special measures so you experience more of the benefits of wise use of Harmonizing and fewer of the costs of overuse.
Support Strategies for Harmonizers
The most difficult conflicts often come with those close to us, our partners and colleagues. The suggestions below are addressed to partners who want to help you function at your best. Given your preference for Harmonizing as a conflict style, others should consider using these strategies with you when differences arise:
Put relationship before task. Relationships always come before tasks for people who favor the Harmonizing style (the opposite of those who favor Directing). In work or negotiations with Harmonizers, use a two-step approach: 1) Begin on a light note and chit-chat for a few minutes, about the weekend, family, sports, etc. 2) Only then settle down to work or serious discussion.
Make small gestures of friendship. Even more than other styles, Harmonizers appreciate a thoughtful note, a compliment, an offer of a something to drink, a well-chosen gift, a card, acknowledgement of work well done, etc. Harmonizers will go farther with you in following discussions or work if you first set the stage with such gestures.
Talk about things in a way that is not angry or hostile. Keep your volume down and listen well. Do not exaggerate or dramatize your emotions, for the Harmonizer already hears and feels them at an amplified level.
Keep it light. Harmonizers tune out of conversations that are long, heavy, and intense. Show a sense of humor, express appreciation, be positive.
Invite disagreement or criticism. Since Harmonizers value relationships and hate offending anyone, they are not quick to speak their mind if they think others disagree. If you want a candid opinion, make it easier for a Harmonizer by letting them know you really want to hear what they think. And of course, don't betray your words by over-reacting.
Avoid marathons. Harmonizers handle long discussions better if you take regular breaks and "lighten up" from time to time.
Voice appreciation. Task-focused people who work with Harmonizers should make special effort to notice and appreciate the Harmonizer and their contributions.
As a Harmonizer you might want to pick out things above that seem true for you and discuss them with people you live or work with.
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